Purity Test/Redesign
If there’s one thing I’ve learned in my nearly 19 years, it’s this: If it worked for Lucas Wagner, it will work for you.
In a twitter post of his, he advised me to “Always do Purity Tests, always redesign. These are the secrets of getting people to visit websites.” And when Lucas Wagner tells you to do something, you do it. I mean, this guy was on the fucking radio.
One problem though: I don’t know the first thing about redesigning websites and I know even less about HTML or anything less than just typing into a template (thank you Comicpress).
So that leaves me with only one option:
The 1st annual Pop and Ice Cream Purity Test!
It’s a little late (Valentines day was about 2 weeks ago) but nevertheless, I will proceed.
Have you ever took a walk on the wild side? (3 pts)
Have you ever hugged someone you didn’t know? (1 pts)
Were they younger than you? (3 pts)
Were they older? (0 pts)
Were they a lot older? Like old old. (-2pts)
Were you actually distantly related? (-5pts)
Have you ever killed a man? (70 pts)
Was it Aquaman? (20 pts)
Did you ever make a purity test just because Lucas Wagner made some off-handed comment that led you to believe that it would be a good idea, but then you realize that your over-your-head, so you give up after 9 questions (Evan, you dumb shit, -1000 points)
Post your score in the comments!
-Evan
In all seriousness, The Gateway’s new redesign is pretty great and you should all go there!
Also checkout the print addition of The Gateway! It’s the bees knees (just in case Mr. Kendrick is reading).
March 10th, 2009 at 9:15 pm
My score: 4. Now get back to work, you slackers.